Dear Internet, I made you a mixtape.

This is pretty nifty website:
http://bemistape.muxtape.com/

Lord, have MRSA on me.

Dear MRS. A,

Thanks for giving me my third to last day of work off! Because of your assistance I was able to get some moving errata accomplished and a full twelve hours of sleep. That said, I'd like to take you to task for a few things.

1. The extraordinary fever. I felt like the HUMAN TORCH.
2. The body aches and chills. It was very difficult to decide whether the fan should be off or on. Terrible.
3. The throbbing. Oh, the throbbing.
4. The oozing hole in my body. Also, six band-aid changes a day? Come on, now.
   
5. The detergent bodywash I get to start using in a couple of days. It cost me thirty dollars and is probably going to sting!
6. The weirdness that going back to work is going to be tomorrow, what with me being very behind on all the things and, oh yeah, them knowing that I've been with you. They all saw that 60 Minutes episode about the football players and they are FREAKED!

In closing, it's been nice knowing you, but I think it's time we went our separate ways. I anticipate dousing you in a chemical bath soon. Please, stop the oozing.

Regards,
John Smith

Saving this for posterior.

I'll spare you the gory details of my super-minor SURGERY (so minor it required thirty seconds of planning, a local anesthetic and a lot of gauze... in fact, click here if you want to see how much gauze).

BUTT I'll say this:

As the doctor (possibly my favorite, lifetime) is coming in I tell him "Man, am I going to make your day or what!" This was a joke because of where the the problem was located.

"Nah, not unless you've got a tick on the head of your penis, because that's what I was just doing over there," he said, pointing through the wall and at what I have to imagine was an unhappy male hiker.

During the procedure he kept pushing there brochures on me about the clinic and suggested I bring them to work. Despite that, if I were staying in Salisbury I would only ever go to that doctor.

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In other news, when I signed up for press credentials for the New York Comic Con (which I did not attend this year) my email was given to every publicist working in genre TV, movies, comic books and video games. In the run up I was getting five or six pitches a day, some of which (especially the interviews) I would have actually looked at taking advantage were I there. Now that the show is long since past I haven't gotten any.... until tonight. This was for a movie and videogame called, yes, Space Chimps.

"We’d love to work with you on any continuing coverage, previews, rounds up, etc. you may have planned coming up; looking at this summer’s big films, seems like sci-fi is going to represent a huge market – X-Files, Wall-e, etc. But what could be more appealing than combining space travel with monkeys?"

Indeed. Man, I could do that.